I’ve been watching the approach on March 8th with a mix of anticipation and more than a little bit of dread. Today is the day my debut short story collection goes out into the world. Happy book birthday Dead Girl, Driving and Other Devastations! I hope you have the best book release EVER!!!
E. L. Doctorow once likened writing a book to navigating a two-lane highway in the fog at night: “you never see further than your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.” As much as this quote has inspired me over the years, I can’t help but feel a little disappointed that Doctorow failed to mention that darkness and fog weren’t the only potential hazards on this cross-country jaunt across unknown territory. If you’re lucky, you might start out with four wheels (in my case, it was a rusted out 1987 Blazer with a leaky radiator and bald tires) but some of us don’t even have that luxury. Sometimes, the best you can do is to set off with a borrowed bicycle mounted with a battery-operated headlight. And when that breaks down, the only choice left is to continue by foot, one step in front of the other as you walk the line, hoping not to be hit by oncoming traffic.
The oldest story in this collection (“More Wings Than the Wind Knows”) was written in 2015. The second is “Rotten,” which was the story I submitted with my MFA application to Stonecoast (University of Southern Maine). These are the only two stories in the collection that were written before my bicycle accident in June 2016. (You can read my post about the accident HERE. Content warnings for graphic images.)
Long story short: not only was my body broken, but I’d also sustained a traumatic brain injury (TBI). Even though I had my new identity in place (a change that occurred in 2013 as part of a protection plan for domestic violence) and I’d been admitted to Stoncoast’s MFA program for Popular Fiction, my life changed in just a few seconds. Between one moment and the next, my dreams of being a writer ended up unconscious, bleeding and broken on the side of the road. No lights. No destination. Just a body wracked with unmanageable pain and a brain wiped as clean as a blank slate.
I struggled to move forward, but I failed on a spectacular level. The pain was unrelenting, and my brain refused to work. The multiple surgeries in the hospital’s trauma unit were followed up with two more: the second of what would be four facial reconstructions and the second of what would be three knee surgeries. Yet still, I was unable to read, unable to write. And when it finally sank in that I couldn’t do the two fundamental tasks associated with being a writer, I approached the darkest time of my life. I counted all the medications I’d hoarded and contemplated my options. That’s when I discovered I was one pill short of a fatal dose of morphine. Would I have made the attempt otherwise? I don’t think so. But I kept that bottle for years before finally disposing of it.
The title story of this collection (“Dead Girl, Driving”) is a result of my own struggles with suicidal ideation. It also includes experiences drawn from domestic abuse. It was a hard story to write, and it is a hard story to read. But it is an important story. I believe it is my responsibility to face the struggles so many of us deal with. And so, in lieu of counseling, I prefer to battle my demons in my short fiction and poetry.
“From fairy tale revisions to fresh takes on monstrous transitions and the absolute horrors of being female, no one knows how to write a story like Carina Bissett. Fierce yet fragile.”
—Lindy Ryan, author of Bless Your Heart“
In June 2018, I graduated with my MFA in Creative Writing. To my surprise, I was asked to be the commencement speaker for my class. Not something I expected as I still harbored feelings of failure for my inability to perform the way I’d hoped. Yet, I also realized I had a message to share with my fellow graduates and the students who were still coming up through the program. In my commencement speech, I told my peers to keep moving despite the inevitable obstacles they would encounter along the way. I urged them to slow down, to take advantage of unexpected side trips, to explore the roads off the beaten path. Because here’s the truth: Doctorow’s sage advice for writing a novel doesn’t apply to the reality of living a literary life. It’s a journey that continues to evolve and change with all its twists and turns. There are no speed limits, no race to the finish line, no end destination neatly marked on a map.
“Carina Bissett is one of my favorite speculative authors writing today—magic and myth, horror and revenge, wonder and hope. Her stories are original, lyrical, and haunting—Shirley Jackson mixed with Ursula LeGuin and a dash of Neil Gaiman. An amazing collection of stories.”
—Richard Thomas, author of Spontaneous Human Combustion, a Bram Stoker Award finalist
Also in 2018, I published my first pro rate story (“A Seed Planted”). By this time, the scars on my face were fading, and I’d found ways to work around my cognitive deficits. In the right light, at a far enough distance, I almost looked normal. Given enough extra time to rework sentences and phrases ad nauseum, my writing appeared comparable to my peers. That’s when I opened the folder with my notes on “Dead Girl, Driving.” Only then did I realize that if I didn’t finish this story, there was a high likelihood that no one would ever know how close I’d come to finding death at my own hand. I decided that was unacceptable. After all, it’s the tough stories that are the most important to tell. And so, I spent a few months working on this piece until I finally captured the emotions I wanted to convey. It eventually found a home in the anthology What Remains (Firbolg Publishing, May 2022). To date, I feel it’s one of the most significant stories I’ve told.
After I finished “Dead Girl, Driving,” I wrote the next story. And then the next. Finally, in November 2022, I picked up a trunked novel, decided to throw away 105,000 words, and then I started over. Today, I am on the last two chapters on what I believe will be my debut novel. It’s taken longer than I wanted, but this is the case with everything I do these days. And I try to remind myself that I deserve a some grace and compassion, that the writing life is a journey, not a destination. It’s hard to remember that sometimes, but Dead Girl, Driving and Other Devastations wouldn’t exist today, if I hadn’t kept going, if I hadn’t pushed myself to go as far as I could see on that lonely, dark road.
I’m not where I wanted to be at this point in my life, but I am very aware that this journey could have been much worse. My ex-husband could have found me and followed through with his promise of murder. My accident could have left me blind and immobile, or worse. And, with the lack of a solid work history under my new identity, I could have easily become homeless. The list goes on. So, yes, I’ve had my share of setbacks, but I’ve had my share of successes too. I co-edited my first anthology Shadow Atlas: Dark Landscapes of the Americas (2021), which won the Colorado Book Award. My 8,000 word retrospective on women in horror—”Words Wielded by Women” (Apex Magazine, 2023)—is currently a finalist in the category Superior Achievement in Short Nonfiction at the 2023 Bram Stoker Awards®. And the Season of the Wolf marks the beginning of my eighth year teaching workshops at The Storied Imaginarium.
These days, I don’t mind the fog in the night. I don’t mind the dark two-lane highway. I am surrounded by people who care about me, writers who I admire, and they give me all the light I need to see my way through. My only hope is that one day, I can be a light for others as well.
“Carina Bissett’s collection is a thing of wonder and beauty. It is a true representation of Carina herself: whimsical, visceral, lovely, and fierce. You can hear women’s voices screaming while roses fall from their lips. Dead Girl, Driving and Other Devastations is a triumph.”
—Mercedes M. Yardley, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of Little Dead Red
In this powerful debut, Carina Bissett explores the liminal spaces between the magical and the mundane, horror and humor, fairy tales and fabulism. A young woman discovers apotheosis at the intersection of her cross-cultural heritage. A simulacrum rebels against her coding to create a new universe of her own making. A poison assassin tears the world apart in the relentless pursuit of her true love—the one person alive who can destroy her. Dead Girl, Driving and Other Devastations erases expectations, forging new trails on the map of contemporary fiction. Includes an introduction by Julie C. Day, author of Uncommon Miracles and The Rampant.
Product details
Publisher: Trepidatio Publishing (March 8, 2024)
Paperback: 164 pages
ISBN-10: 1685101232 / ISBN-13: 978-1685101237
Purchase Links
“In a debut collection weaving folklore and fairy tale and told in magical, lyrical, irresistible prose, Carina Bissett inveigles readers with the breadth of her skill. A feat of woven wonder, with spells sketched in the air and strands stretched taut, Dead Girl Driving and Other Devastations is an enchanting tapestry of silken stories, the collection establishing Bissett as a world-class author of fabulism, fantasy, and horror. A must-read for lovers of Neil Gaiman, Angela Slatter, and Carmen Maria Machado.”
—Lee Murray, five-time Bram Stoker Awards-winning author of Grotesque: Monster Stories